Monday, September 29, 2003


Another Week of Bits and Pieces

Yes, I could write a decent, coherent narrative this week. But let's face it, those links from last week were fun. One more little bits and pieces entry, and then I'll write more, cross my heart.

After all, who could resist Encyclopedia Brown's obituary?

A week ago I got to play with my toddler cousins again. I never get to see little kids anymore unless I make a special effort, and this is odd to me after years of working at a children's book store and having my sisters on hand whenever I'd like to see them. I should have spent more time with my aunt Laura and cousin Audrey, but they sent all the kids out to play, and that just killed me.

"Would you guys mind if I went out and played with the kids? I never get any play time since I moved."

Audrey was exhausted, leaning in her chair. "GO! I get too much time with them! Have your turn! Please!"

Laura snickered. Weather this is because she's a stay at home mom, or because Audrey is pregnant again is up for debate.

This guy things we should Kill All the Librarians. He seems upset chiefly because we're raising awareness of the USA PATRIOT act. When people know what is allowed under this act, they are generally appalled. You know, the crusaders burned librarians.

This is why we should exercise our right to make fun of that scary John Ashcroft as much as possible.

So, why would I want to play with toddlers? Why would I miss hanging out with kids? Example:

Colin and Ruel are involved with their own game, which involves pretending to be Leopards. Ellie, who is 2 and a half, feels a bit left out. So I lean down and ask her: "Would you like to read a book?"


"Want to play on the swings?"

"No." She pauses, and looks up at me, clearly forming one of those toddler tests for grownups in her mind. "Let's pretend the monkeys are coming."

I stand up and say the right thing: "Oh NO! The monkeys are coming! What should we do?"

"RUN!" screams Ellie, and we tear ass to our grandfather's bed, where Ellie assures me the only way to monkey protection is through tents made out of blankets.

My days are mix of delight and fear. If only I needed to make up imaginary monkeys to scare myself.

"I don't know that Atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered patriots. This is one nation under God." -George Bush senior

In order to blend in undetected with evangelical Christians, most Atheists now tend to be morbidly obese and will tell you, whether asked or not, that their enormous girth is the result of an undetectable thyroid condition and not the box of Little Debbie cakes they are holding.

this guy died. It's worth mentioning because he wrote my favorite biography of Truman Capote, and because he was an upper class rich white guy, that, so far as I know, wasn't a bastard. Worth mentioning after all the other links on this page.

I'm going to be late for work. I have to go in early on Mondays and Fridays because I have Spanish lessons. Hasta Luego.

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